Relationships

 

 

 

 

 

 

Child Abuse

 

Child Abuse is when a parent, relative or caregiver hits, ignores or mistreats children or youth. Abuse may take place anywhere including the child's home or that of someone known to the child. Types of child abuse include: Physicalviolence or hitting, neglecting to give children food or shelter or love, safety, and a sense of worth. There is also emotional abuse which might be yelling or not giving children a sense of feeling good about themselves. Abuse can also be sexual when adults touch children inappropriately, have sexual intercourse with them or force them to do it with someone else.  

Child Abuse Facts

  • The vast majority of child abusers are parents, relatives, or trusted adults, not strangers.
  • Children rarely lie about abuse.
  • They are more likely to deny abuse and take back truthful statements than to make false reports.      
  • Child abuse happens in both rich and poor families.
  • Child abuse usually means that there is ongoing abusive behaviour rather than just a one time incident.

Signs of Neglect and Physical and Emotional Abuse

  • When children always have lots of injuries, cuts or bruises.
  • When children seem passive, withdrawn or act out in disruptive ways.
  • When children don’t look well groomed or properly dressed. Clothes might be dirty, ill-fitting, ragged, and/or not suitable for the weather.
  • Unwashed appearance; offensive body odour.
  • Indicators of hunger: asking for or stealing food, going through trash for food, eating too fast or too much when food is provided for a group.
  • When it looks like children are wandering alone, left home alone, or left in a car with no one looking out for them or supervising them.
  • Colds, fevers, or rashes left untreated; infected cuts; chronic tiredness.
  • In schoolchildren, frequent absence or lateness; troublesome, disruptive behavior or its opposite, withdrawal.
  • In babies, failure to thrive; failure to relate to other people or to surroundings.
  • Headaches, nausea.
  • Speech disorders and or lags in physical development.
  • Habit disorders (sucking, biting, rocking, etc.), learning disorders, sleep disorders and bed wetting.
  • Unusual fearfulness and phobias.

Signs of Sexual Abuse

  • Children touching themselves or others in a sexual way, or acting out sexual acts in their play.
  • Children showing inappropriate interest in or knowledge of sexual acts.
  • Seductive behavior – children seek inappropriate affection.
  • Reluctance or refusal to undress in front of others.
  • Extra aggression and disruptive behaviour or, at the other end of the spectrum, extra compliance.
  • Fear of a particular person or family member.
  • Difficulty walking or sitting.
  • Pain when urinating, vaginal/penile discharge and/or urinary tract infections.

What to do if a child tells you they’ve been abused?

  • Believe in the child, lack of belief will discourage the abused from telling you what happened.
  • Listen openly and calmly. Give the child your full attention. Put the child first and put your feelings (anger, frustration or pain) aside.
  • Reassure the child but never make promises. Be supportive and tell the child what has happened is not his/her fault.

Tips for Preventing Child Abuse

  • Support prevention programs.
  • Attend parenting skills workshops or programs.
  • Act when you see any mistreatment of a child.
  • Read children stories that deal with issue ie. “The Secret of the Silver Horse” (published by the Minister of Justice and Attorney General of Canada) or “Eagle Child” (by Sandra Montour).
  • Talk to your children about their bodies. Explain to them what is appropriate and inappropriate touching and how to get help if they need it.
  • Know your childcare provider. Make sure the people that you allow to care for your children have had criminal record checks.

For information on abusive relationships and how to prevent and deal with them, visit the Relationships Preventing and Dealing with Abuse section of this site, or visit the websites below:

BC Health Guide
http://www.healthlinkbc.ca/kbase/topic/symptom/dabus/overview.htm

Health Canada
http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/ncfv-cnivf/familyviolence/pdfs/fem-2006-abuse-wrg_e.pdf

Victoria Women’s Transition House
http://www.transitionhouse.net/what_is_abuse/

 

For more information child abuse, how to prevent and what to do if you think a child is being abused visit the following websites:

Children’s Safety Association of Canada
http://www.safekid.org/

The Canadian Department of Justice
http://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/pi/fv-vf/facts-info/child-enf.pdf

The Royal Canadian Mounted Police
http://www.rcmp-grc.gc.ca/ccaps-spcca/chi-enf-eng.htm

 

 

Sources:

US Department of Health and Human Services: What is Abuse? http://www.4women.gov/violence/signs/
Health Canada: Abuse is wrong in any language.
http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/ncfv-cnivf/familyviolence/pdfs/fem-2006-abuse-wrg_e.pdf
Victoria Women’s Transition House Society: Stages of an Abusive Relationship. http://www.transitionhouse.net/what_is_abuse/cycle.php